Having my finger on the pulse of Hollywood as I do (or does Hollywood have its finger on my pulse?) I am happy to announce that less than 24 hours after my warning against over zealous studios opening the floodgates on ill-conceived tack ons to old movie franchises (see below), Paramount pictures has announced plans to revive the "Beverly Hills Cop" franchise with Eddie Murphy attached to reprise his role as Axel Foley and guess who???? Brett Ratner is attached to direct.
http://www.variety.com/article/VR1117986558.html?categoryid=13&cs=1
Not only did I predict a tidal wave of new franchise films rolling out in lieu of Indy 4's commercial success (see below) but also identified Brett Ratner as a probable accomplice to this rash decision making (see a bit farther below, "Godfather 4" )
Now it's not impressive that I predicted a bunch of new franchise films frantically being pushed out to capitilize on Indy's success but the fact that less than 24 hours ago I spoke out against the "slippery slope" old franchise revivals, Paramount shoves it in my face by announcing plans to produce another film from a mediocre 80's franchise. Seems to me, my suspicions are dead on! Just wait, The Godfather 4 starring Lauren Conrad coming soon to theatres....
If "Beverly Hills Cop 4" wants any chance at success, two words: Judge Reinhold
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
INDIANA JONES AND THE GREATEST EXTORTION SCHEME IN MODERN MOVIE HISTORY
Let’s Be Clear: THIS IS NOT A REVIEW OF INDIANA JONES 4, THIS IS AN EXAMINATION OF THE CULTURAL AND ECONOMIC EFFECTS THE FOURTH INSTALLMENT OF THIS FRANCHISE HAS PERPETUATED:
“It’s like ripping a band-aid off.”
This was the response from my good friend upon being asked why he had to see the new Indiana Jones Movie. He continued:
“You know it’s going to be painful, you just have grit your teeth and do it.”
This is the analogy from a “true fan” of the Indiana Jones franchise. Comparing the hallowed trilogy to the painful task of ripping a band-aid off of a healed wound; Momentary pain followed by the relief of the experience being over............................Something is very, very wrong here.
I am quite sure that the purpose of making films is to incite the exact OPPOSITE reaction from an audience. And yet, one weekend and an over $300 million haul for a film that is being compared to getting tetanus shots.
The critical reviews have been relatively mixed, even boarding on a positive majority. Yet, of the 30 or so people I have spoken with, not one has given it a thumbs up. In fact, a distinct sense of ire, disdain and disgust for this film was evident in most of their opinions.
It has gone as far as people posting their opinions on Facebook:
Ashley “wishes George Lucas would stop screwing everything up”
Mark says “Indy 4, not good”
Kim “is warning you....do not go see the new Indiana Jones! Yes, Harrison Ford is still sexy but no amount of sexiness can save this movie”
And that is just a small sample of what I have been reading all week.
So why are all these people submitting to George Lucas’ version of water boarding? Are we a country of masochists? (Some would argue yes, citing the outrageously high ratings for MTV’s “The Hills”....but that is for a later blog.)
Why would people all over the world march en mass into theatres, over $300 million worth, to witness something that they are pretty sure is going to be a waste of time and make them mad?
We need to look no further than the sheer genius of George Lucas and Steven Spielberg. Two of the most lauded filmmakers of all time have successfully pulled off the largest extortion scheme in modern movie history.
ex·tor·tion [ik-stawr-shuh n] –noun
1. an act or instance of extorting.
2. Law. the crime of obtaining money or some other thing of value by the abuse of one's office or authority.
3. oppressive or illegal exaction, as of excessive price or interest:
Let’s focus on the second definition above. Specifically, “by the abuse of one’s office or authority.”
GEORGE AND STEVEN ARE THE AUTHORITY, at least in terms of creating memorable cinematic experiences; Star Wars, E.T., Jaws, Jurassic Park, and yes, Indiana Jones. And that is just the tip of the iceburg in relation to what these guys have contributed to film making over the years. My point is, when these guys make a film, especially together, and they tell us to go see it, we pony up the ten bucks and go and see it.
2. Law. the crime of obtaining money or some other thing of value by the abuse of one's office or authority.
Which is why what they have done with “Indiana Old and the Kingdom of the Crystal Crapfest” is good ‘ol fashioned extortion. Prof. Harold Hill from the “Music Man” couldn’t have pulled it off better himself. There are so many people that HAVE to see this movie. Let me repeat, not WANT TO but HAVE TO spend the ten dollars, no matter what, simply out of affection for a classic hero character that gave them so much joy. It’s homage if you will, a ten dollar donation to the “Keeping Harrison Ford’s Career Relevant Fund.” Although this fund is not charitable in any regard, it flows directly into the pockets of George, Steven, Dreamworks, Paramount and the rest of the “Authority.” Which makes it extortion. On the grandest scale possible.
Now, I want to be very clear, I DO NOT THINK THIS IS A BAD THING. In fact, I think it’s genius. The type of scheme only concocted by some of the smartest, savviest entrepreneurs to ever walk Hollywood Blvd.
Furthermore, I BELIEVE GEORGE AND STEVEN DESERVE IT.
The ability of a film to sell over $300 million worth of tickets on one weekend as the direct result of being attached to a film franchise that is almost 20 years old is truly incredible. Especially in an industry as fickle as Hollywood, for a franchise to have that type of staying power means only one thing; this is a canon of films that have that have left indelible impact on the memories and imaginations of millions of movie fans worldwide, enough of an impact that 20 years after the fact these fans are willing to shell out millions of dollars just to see the new movie in its first weekend of release. That’s powerful stuff.
If you have that kind of control over such a large audience, it’s kind of hard not to be like, “Well......umm.....how do you feel about making $800 million?” “Hmm, well......I guess I could be into that.”
For the record, the Star Wars franchise is exempt because the scripts were written thirty years ago and had to be made, end of story. Not enough time to dissect that beast. The “Lord of the Rings Trilogy” is in the same boat, “The Hobbit” was already written. This post speaks directly to act of just creating an additional film out of nowhere, years after the fact.
Do I think Indy Four is bad? Yes.
Do you I think George and Steven set out to phone this one in? No.
In fact there’s a reason they took so long to make this latest installment, they needed the right script. I truly believe George and Steven wanted to make something worthy of Indy franchise if not to just to maintain the integrity of their respective brands but also to deliver something respectable to millions of people that have clearly stuck with them. Oh yeah, and they needed to maintain a solid 8 week theatrical run and keep the momentum for a monstrous DVD sales push. (Can you say Christmas-time box set? Cha-Ching!)
I know that I am throwing out the word extortion a lot here and it kind of seems like a nasty word but I think it’s just funny how this whole crazy movie business works. George and Steven and not criminals but this whole Indy thing is a form of extortion, at least in a tongue and cheek, sarcastic, works-for-my-blog-topic kind of way.
Did I get caught in the whole Indy hoopla? No.
I wasn’t really a fan of the franchise back in the day, Raiders of the Lost Ark is far and away the best film of the three and pretty entertaining one at that and I can see where the fans’ excitement comes from. I can share other people’s enthusiasm for the upcoming Batman film but that is more based of my obsession with director Christopher Nolan’s previous superhero endeavor, “Batman Begins” (not to mention both films are shot almost exclusively in Chicago).
So, I get it and obviously Steven and George get it. There’s a market out there for these additions to famous franchises. But it’s a slippery slope:
Clearly, another significant part of this whole phenomenon is reviving aging movie stars’ careers. Sylvester Stallone perfected this method with the recent “Rocky” and “Rambo” revivals. He not only made a ton of money, put himself back in the public eye but did so with films from franchises that people weren’t even clamoring for!
Harrison Ford looks at Sly and says, “I gotta get me some of that.”
Ford was recently quoted a Cannes film festival as saying he would play Indiana Jones as long as they’d let him.
Yeah, I’ll bet. This coming from a guy who hasn’t made a decent flick in over a decade. You don’t need to reprise the sure fire winner role for us to like you. I don’t want to use the word pathetic..............tired maybe?
This is why we need to be careful.
We can’t go crazy tacking on prequels and sequels to every beloved film franchise from the last 50 years.
This being the point of my post, I pray the market does not allow for a slew of additions to some of our most beloved franchises. Because let’s be honest here, the market dictates what sells and what doesn’t. If there is demand, it will be supplied, and sometimes that means $300 million in one weekend for sub par film.
But it could spell disaster in the future, I can see it now:
“The Godfather IV” starring Lauren Conrad from MTV’s “The Hills.”
A granddaughter of the Corleone family leaves New York to pursue a career in partying and looking hot in LA. All the while, accompanied her wacky, “out of touch” grandfather that just might make any rascally young men “Sleep with the Fishes! Hahaha!” “Action!” “Romance!” “Desire!” “Shoes!” This summer, LC will put the Orgy in Organized Crime! Directed by Bret Ratner.
“The Good, the Bad and the Ugly pt. 2: Hawaiian Adventure” starring Cameron Diaz, Patrick Dempsey and America Ferrera.
See what happens when these cool “compadres” go “loco” in Maui! Forget the horses, forget the dust, this is fresh, sexy “film” takes you on a roller coaster of FUN! FUN! and more FUN! See Cameron “accidentally” hit Patrick in the head with a banana while they both wear swimming suits! America Ferrera will smile with braces in this sassy new comedy from the creators of “Good Luck Chuck”
If they even think about touching “Back to the Future” I am going jump off a bridge.
Unless, it’s the re-envisioning of my favorite trilogy as a gritty drama starring Marty Mcfly as a renegade cop bent on doling out old fashioned justice. With the help of chemical terrorist side-kick “the Doc” they tirelessly battle the army robots controlled by the ruthless dictator Biff in the now dystopian landscape of Hill Valley.
And you thought it was going to be all politics........
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Forget Iran, Attack Kentucky and West Virginia!
Let's Be Clear: THIS POST IS NOT CONDEMNATION OF KENTUCKY AND W. VIRGINIA ELECTING HILLARY CLINTON IN THE RECENT DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY. THIS IS AN ATTACK ON THESE STATES BASED OFF THE ELECTION'S EXIT POLLS.
21% in Kentucky
19% in W. Virginia
The above statistics relate to the percentage of voters who stated that race was a factor in their decision to vote against Barak Obama.
Don't believe it? Here are the facts:
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/politics/2008/05/21/ec.seg.gergen.cnn?iref=24hours
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/hc-obama0520.artmay20,0,5909941.story http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/14/us/politics/14dems.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
And there is much, much more out there.
All three presidential candidates need to stop talking about how they are going to deal with the threat of Iran and shift their focus to how we are going to deal with large percentage of small minded, racist, disgusting ignoramuses that continue to live and breed in our country. Specifically, based off the most recent Democratic primaries, the folks who participated in exit polling in Kentucky and W. Virginia and stated to a total stranger that they would not vote for a black person.
For the record, I am not suggesting that Iran is small problem or shouldn't be carefully examined and dealt with, it should, but I am simply pointing out the fact that because of a failed policy in the middle east, we sometimes lose focus on glaring problems in our own country.
From the above Chicago Tribune article:
"Terry Jordan, 47, who runs a year-round garage sale in front of an old filling station on Main Street, put it simply: "It's his color."
Now, I won't even begin to address the litany of potential jokes based on Terry Jordan's "year round garage sale." Ok, well, one; Terry Jordan's whole life is a year round garage sale. Boom!
Ok, now that I have that out of the way, I would like to express my utter disappointment in the fact that such a large group of people from the country I live in would actually flat out say something so out of line, so demeaning to themselves, and so embarrassing to their state, to a national news reporter. Obviously, this is the same type of person who expressed racist feelings to exit pollers on Tuesday in KY and in W. Va last week. Do these people live in 2008? How could they feel comfortable enough to freely admit they are a racist? My only answer is sheer ignorance and an entire state that fosters that ignorance. They should change Kentucky's state slogan from "Unbridled Spirit" to "Unbridled Ignorance."
To further my point, here's Jack Bunnell from the same article:
"Right now it's not that Hillary attracts the white vote," said Jack Bunnell, 79. "It's that Obama's black."
These people are so stupid (for lack of a better term) and out of touch that they literally make up there minds like this, "Well, hell, I don't like having a woman in there but god dammit we're not gonna have some black guy running things." Why? Why can't we? I fear the answer to that question.
Now, obviously what I'm using here is a selected quote, but the three above articles, plus many more, are concentrated on the fact that there is a significant feeling of racism among these voters, quite a large percentage in the states of Kentucky and W. Virginia. It's documented:
21% OF KENTUCKIANS THAT VOTED FOR HILLARY CLINTON TOLD A TOTAL STRANGER THAT RACE WAS A FACTOR IN THEIR DECISION, REMEMBER THAT???
Those are the facts. Period. End of story. What it makes me think of now is how many people in this unwashed state feel the same way but had the one brain cell it takes to not mention it to a POLLER. My guess is quite a few.
To reiterate my point, this is America and you are free to vote for whomever you chose and you are allowed to feel any way you like. My problem is with the incredible ignorance of someone speaking out to a national survey about how they are racist and don't really care.
In a sick way, it's a good thing they've identified themselves as racists because even though we may have had an idea before we now have documented proof of the ignorance bastions of the United States.
Melody Chaney, from the Tribune article, doesn't seem to agree:
"To attribute it solely to ignorance would be totally inaccurate," said Melody Chaney, a financial adviser in Munfordville and a Clinton supporter. "It's a matter of education, their upbringing and their background."
I can only imagine what a financial adviser in Munfordville, KY says to her clients, "Well, um, I'm not really sure what 100 + 200 is, let me call the head office.......OK....they're telling me it's 300. You have $300 so that means you can leverage your own half of trailer with that. You're rich boy!" Ok, enough of that.
I was mistaken before when I said Melody Chaney disagreed with me, she actually helped prove my point. This is not is not just a case of straight ignorance. No no no. This is the result of the Commonwealth of Kentucky's ignorant education system, and these people's ignorant upbringing and the pervasive ignorance of their background.
Ms. Chaney is trying to justify racism and I will not accept it.
I don't care that its part of who they are, make it not part of who you are, get your head out of your ass. Or for god's sake, please don't embarrass your state and your country by freely admitting to strangers that you are a racist.
I know there are good people in Kentucky. My uncle lives in Louisville and he is a good man. His ex-wife is not. She is a racist, among other things. Her father literally ran from the alter at his daughter's wedding ceremony so he could go start chain smoking again. Should have been a red flag right there. I'm not insinuating that smokers are racists, but I'm trying to frame the character of a man who made some the most outrageous racist remarks, and a seconded by his daughter, that I have ever heard and dare not repeat here.
I know there are thousands of people in Kentucky and W. Virginia who are not racists and are not ignorant. But, I feel that they and their government are responsible in part for fostering those types of sentiments.
Overall, I am just flat out disappointed and shocked that such blatant disrespected for human equality still exists in this day and age. Maybe I'm the one who's ignorant.
I can hear it now, "Oh, what do you know about racism. You grew up in an affluent suburb of Chicago" or "Why do you care? It doesn't affect you." But it DOES affect me. It embarrasses me. It angers me. I am sick of the attitude that these types of remarks don't matter. They have no place in our political system and I feel obligated to speak my mind. No it doesn't affect me directly, but I'm exactly the type of person who needs to care or this dysfunctional, unfair and disgusting zeitgeist will continue to survive and prevail.
We don't have to stand for it, become disenfranchised or let evil, fear and racism win. I believe we are better than that. You will start to see if from the Republicans, as you already saw hints from Hillary, i.e. "Do you really want a black guy running the country?" There is no answer to that question because it should never be posed in the first place. The question is, which candidate best represents your interests and values? If that's Hillary or McCain, fine, there's no problem with that, that is your right as a voter. But, let us not get bogged down by racism and ignorance, please, I believe America is better than that, even though some will lead you to believe that it isn't. You'll hear, "Our country's just too racist still" or "The South isn't ready for a black president" but I DO NOT BELIEVE THAT
We can do it, we can be better (let's face it, anything is better than the President we have now) but I implore you to not let racism and the what the perceived "status quo" alter or influence your vote. If the founding fathers were alive today, they would marvel and be so proud of three lead candidates we have, a war hero, a woman and a black man. Such diversity and the way it was achieved is the model of America and something to be proud of, let's remember that all the way to November.
21% in Kentucky
19% in W. Virginia
The above statistics relate to the percentage of voters who stated that race was a factor in their decision to vote against Barak Obama.
Don't believe it? Here are the facts:
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/politics/2008/05/21/ec.seg.gergen.cnn?iref=24hours
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/hc-obama0520.artmay20,0,5909941.story http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/14/us/politics/14dems.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
And there is much, much more out there.
All three presidential candidates need to stop talking about how they are going to deal with the threat of Iran and shift their focus to how we are going to deal with large percentage of small minded, racist, disgusting ignoramuses that continue to live and breed in our country. Specifically, based off the most recent Democratic primaries, the folks who participated in exit polling in Kentucky and W. Virginia and stated to a total stranger that they would not vote for a black person.
For the record, I am not suggesting that Iran is small problem or shouldn't be carefully examined and dealt with, it should, but I am simply pointing out the fact that because of a failed policy in the middle east, we sometimes lose focus on glaring problems in our own country.
From the above Chicago Tribune article:
"Terry Jordan, 47, who runs a year-round garage sale in front of an old filling station on Main Street, put it simply: "It's his color."
Now, I won't even begin to address the litany of potential jokes based on Terry Jordan's "year round garage sale." Ok, well, one; Terry Jordan's whole life is a year round garage sale. Boom!
Ok, now that I have that out of the way, I would like to express my utter disappointment in the fact that such a large group of people from the country I live in would actually flat out say something so out of line, so demeaning to themselves, and so embarrassing to their state, to a national news reporter. Obviously, this is the same type of person who expressed racist feelings to exit pollers on Tuesday in KY and in W. Va last week. Do these people live in 2008? How could they feel comfortable enough to freely admit they are a racist? My only answer is sheer ignorance and an entire state that fosters that ignorance. They should change Kentucky's state slogan from "Unbridled Spirit" to "Unbridled Ignorance."
To further my point, here's Jack Bunnell from the same article:
"Right now it's not that Hillary attracts the white vote," said Jack Bunnell, 79. "It's that Obama's black."
These people are so stupid (for lack of a better term) and out of touch that they literally make up there minds like this, "Well, hell, I don't like having a woman in there but god dammit we're not gonna have some black guy running things." Why? Why can't we? I fear the answer to that question.
Now, obviously what I'm using here is a selected quote, but the three above articles, plus many more, are concentrated on the fact that there is a significant feeling of racism among these voters, quite a large percentage in the states of Kentucky and W. Virginia. It's documented:
21% OF KENTUCKIANS THAT VOTED FOR HILLARY CLINTON TOLD A TOTAL STRANGER THAT RACE WAS A FACTOR IN THEIR DECISION, REMEMBER THAT???
Those are the facts. Period. End of story. What it makes me think of now is how many people in this unwashed state feel the same way but had the one brain cell it takes to not mention it to a POLLER. My guess is quite a few.
To reiterate my point, this is America and you are free to vote for whomever you chose and you are allowed to feel any way you like. My problem is with the incredible ignorance of someone speaking out to a national survey about how they are racist and don't really care.
In a sick way, it's a good thing they've identified themselves as racists because even though we may have had an idea before we now have documented proof of the ignorance bastions of the United States.
Melody Chaney, from the Tribune article, doesn't seem to agree:
"To attribute it solely to ignorance would be totally inaccurate," said Melody Chaney, a financial adviser in Munfordville and a Clinton supporter. "It's a matter of education, their upbringing and their background."
I can only imagine what a financial adviser in Munfordville, KY says to her clients, "Well, um, I'm not really sure what 100 + 200 is, let me call the head office.......OK....they're telling me it's 300. You have $300 so that means you can leverage your own half of trailer with that. You're rich boy!" Ok, enough of that.
I was mistaken before when I said Melody Chaney disagreed with me, she actually helped prove my point. This is not is not just a case of straight ignorance. No no no. This is the result of the Commonwealth of Kentucky's ignorant education system, and these people's ignorant upbringing and the pervasive ignorance of their background.
Ms. Chaney is trying to justify racism and I will not accept it.
I don't care that its part of who they are, make it not part of who you are, get your head out of your ass. Or for god's sake, please don't embarrass your state and your country by freely admitting to strangers that you are a racist.
I know there are good people in Kentucky. My uncle lives in Louisville and he is a good man. His ex-wife is not. She is a racist, among other things. Her father literally ran from the alter at his daughter's wedding ceremony so he could go start chain smoking again. Should have been a red flag right there. I'm not insinuating that smokers are racists, but I'm trying to frame the character of a man who made some the most outrageous racist remarks, and a seconded by his daughter, that I have ever heard and dare not repeat here.
I know there are thousands of people in Kentucky and W. Virginia who are not racists and are not ignorant. But, I feel that they and their government are responsible in part for fostering those types of sentiments.
Overall, I am just flat out disappointed and shocked that such blatant disrespected for human equality still exists in this day and age. Maybe I'm the one who's ignorant.
I can hear it now, "Oh, what do you know about racism. You grew up in an affluent suburb of Chicago" or "Why do you care? It doesn't affect you." But it DOES affect me. It embarrasses me. It angers me. I am sick of the attitude that these types of remarks don't matter. They have no place in our political system and I feel obligated to speak my mind. No it doesn't affect me directly, but I'm exactly the type of person who needs to care or this dysfunctional, unfair and disgusting zeitgeist will continue to survive and prevail.
We don't have to stand for it, become disenfranchised or let evil, fear and racism win. I believe we are better than that. You will start to see if from the Republicans, as you already saw hints from Hillary, i.e. "Do you really want a black guy running the country?" There is no answer to that question because it should never be posed in the first place. The question is, which candidate best represents your interests and values? If that's Hillary or McCain, fine, there's no problem with that, that is your right as a voter. But, let us not get bogged down by racism and ignorance, please, I believe America is better than that, even though some will lead you to believe that it isn't. You'll hear, "Our country's just too racist still" or "The South isn't ready for a black president" but I DO NOT BELIEVE THAT
We can do it, we can be better (let's face it, anything is better than the President we have now) but I implore you to not let racism and the what the perceived "status quo" alter or influence your vote. If the founding fathers were alive today, they would marvel and be so proud of three lead candidates we have, a war hero, a woman and a black man. Such diversity and the way it was achieved is the model of America and something to be proud of, let's remember that all the way to November.
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